Easter reflection for me

It's been a long time since the last time I wrote on this blog. I just wanted to share what's on my mind regarding easter 2009.

Easter has always been a time when I reflect on Jesus' suffering. I always feel deeply saddened everytime I watch Jesus' movie, especially the crucifixion. The movie was shown yesterday in my church easter service. I cry everytime I watch the crucifixion, don't know why I get so emotional about it. At that point in time, I feel like Peter that I will do everything for Jesus, for my Lord.

But yesterday while watching the movie at church I was reminded by the Holy Spirit of the sermon that I once heard. The preacher said, "being sorry and sad is one thing, but being Christlike is what matters!!" ...

How true is that for me? Many times I feel sad to see Jesus' death and resurrection, but at the same time I DON't spend time in prayer, not trusting Him fully with my life, not believing in Him, not praying regularly, didn't trust His Word and promises, feeling proud, not loving, and the list goes on. It's like wishy-washy feeling with no action. USELESS!!!!

This easter for me is a reminder to "walk the feeling" ... Feeling bad about our sin is good if it is accompanied by repentance ...

Praise be to God because our Lord Jesus has won over sin and death so everyone who believes in Him can receive God's blessing in this life and eternal life in the life to come!!

False teacher vs. True Teacher LIVE on YOUTUBE

FALSE TEACHER: Joel Osteen
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-8999261247040259708 (Preaching)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MfwYU2pmWYQ (interview with Larry King)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vPeYUXuuRUM (interview with Larry King)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oMwW6Q1JfAA&feature=related (Analysis of his interview with Larry King)

vs.

TRUE TEACHER: Paul Washer
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uuabITeO4l8 (Preaching


Hi friends/brothers/sisters in Jesus,

My prayer by sending this email are

• (VERY IMPORTANT) ALL OF US including me who profess ourselves as Christian and have received Jesus as saviour and Lord LIVES IN SYNC with that calling. Please examine ourselves (me) most of all are we really saved. Do we live no different to the world? Otherwise maybe sadly we are deceiving ourselves and going to HELL.
  
• Recognize false teachers from their fruits. I am so angry at Joel Osteen my heart wants to burst out. The bible says don't judge your brothers, but Paul was also very strong towards false teachers. I hope we can recognize them from their fruits and the message that they bring. Please compare the two preaching and let me know your thoughts. Please don't be deceived by them.

Humbly In Christ,
Adi


Matthew 7

The Narrow and Wide Gates

¹³"Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. ¹⁴But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.

A Tree and Its Fruit

¹⁵"Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves. ¹⁶By their fruit you will recognize them. Do people pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? ¹⁷Likewise every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. ¹⁸A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit. ¹⁹Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. ²⁰Thus, by their fruit you will recognize them.

²¹"Not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only he who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. ²²Many will say to me on that day, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?' ²³Then I will tell them plainly, 'I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!'

The Wise and Foolish Builders

²⁴"Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. ²⁵The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. ²⁶But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. ²⁷The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash."

²⁸When Jesus had finished saying these things, the crowds were amazed at his teaching, ²⁹because he taught as one who had authority, and not as their teachers of the law.

Humility

Humility is something that we should aspire to. People has a positive image of someone who is humble in comparison to an arrogant person. But what is humility really? I have been thinking and struggling with this myself lately, as I fall a lot in the sin of pride and arrogance. The bible says that God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble (James 4:6b). The first sin and the fall of satan were primarily because of pride, wanted to be equal with God. One preacher even said that pride is demonic and it must not reside in the heart of God's children.

In the course of human history, we often heard people say that someone is humble. Many world leaders are great because even though they are capable of doing something great and full of talents such as leading a nation or military soldiers, but they are also humble and considerate of others at the same time.

First of all, I want to think from human point of view of what humility is. Human can lower himself/herself because of the following reasons:

1. Self-pity: the person has no talent, so there is nothing to boast about in his/her life. No matter what circumstances he/she is in, this person is "Minder"towards others. (self-pitying himself)
2. Circumstances: the circumstances do not allow the person to think highly of himself. For example, the person may be among a group of people who are way above him/her in terms of social status, economic condition, expertise, educational background, experiences, etc. Another case is the person is forced to humble himself by law/circumstances.
3. Self-willing because of his/her love and respect for other human being. An example of this is that a father is willing to beg just for the family to have food on the table
4. Self-willing because of his/her love and respect for God. An example of this is Jesus and the prophets in the Old Testament who are willing to give everything to do God's will.

A person who does (1), (2) cannot be considered humble at all. (3) has merit because the person did it for other people and not himself/forced to do so. (4) has the highest merit because it is not for self-gain and it is done because of his/her love for her Creator, who is the very reason of why he/she lives.

Looking at the bible, I can't help to acknowledge that Jesus is our most humble God and human being at the same time. Jesus teaches about humility in (Luke 14:7-14). He gave an example on how a person who exalts himself will be humbled, yet a person who humbles himself will be exalted. Funny enough, Jesus did not just teach, but with integrity Jesus also did the same thing. The verse in Philippians struck me hard on how Jesus actually humbled Himself so much that God exalted Him above all names in heaven and under the earth. (Philippians 2:5-11). To me this is the fulfillment of what He taught earlier in Luke 14.

So going back to the definition of humility, is humility equal to

1. Not acknowledging what we have in life and always look at others as more highly than ourselves or
2. Acknowledging that God is the giver of what we have in life?

I supposed it is very clear that normal people will choose the later. After all, Jesus acknowledged Himself as God in front of His disciples and Pontius Pilate, Cayaphas, etc. He did not hide the fact that He was God plus the first seemed like self-pity if we look at it closely.

But I just can't help to think of the Word in Philipians which says that Jesus emptied Himself. According to the bible, it means that Jesus, being in the very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but emptied Himself and take form of a servant (which is the total opposite of God), humbled Himself until He died on the cross. And that's why God the Father exalts Him so much and He is forever to be praised, Amen. So in this case, Jesus because of His obedience to God, did all of that. It's amazing. So to me, humility may mean that times that because of our obedience to God, God wants us to lower ourselves, social status, and doing God's Will. Even though we are great and able to do lots of things, sometimes because of God's will, we need to humble ourselves and let go of all those self-attributes, self-righteousness to do His will.

Letting go of what we are/have at times because of our love for God is not equal to self-pity. I believe that's true humility!!!

In less than 6 months, God-willing I'll be married. I humbly ask God that Me and nonik will grow in humility towards each other.

Youth vs. Oldies

Hello, haven't updated this blog for a while. But glad to finally have the time to do so... :)

I accidentally thought about the above topic through the circumstances that I am in at the moment. I guess my Lord Jesus has been gracious to me ... Always at the right time he gave His Word when I need it ...

This topic (as most topic) has two sides of the coin.
- Young people thinks that they know better and thinks their older parents as old-fashioned
- Older generation don't want to listen to anybody even though they are clearly wrong

I always struggle about this myself. Just to give an example, my parents are not Christian and me being still relatively young (and dangerous ^o^) and claiming to 'know' the Word of God (even though I don't really know that much either) makes me reluctant to respect their advices and opinions. To be fair to myself, some of their advices really don't fit into what the bible says. Well, how did (should) I deal with the situation?

This is not just about my relationship with my parents. Sometimes at church I feel that I know better in terms of how to act, what to say than some of my older brothers/sisters in Christ. I don't deny that older men/women have a lot more experiences than me in life, but I can't help to feel that they need to behave to a higher level of Christian behaviors to gain respect from me ... Sinful am I not?

Recently I prayed about it while feeling pain and struggle inside me. My gracious God reminded me of
1 Timothy 4:12
12Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.
And then Paul continued with how Timothy should treat older generation
1 Timothy 5:1
1Do not rebuke an older man harshly, but exhort him as if he were your father. Treat younger men as brothers, 2older women as mothers, and younger women as sisters, with absolute purity

Thank God for His Word. I believe it is the Holy Spirit that reminded me how I should behave as young people. The Word of God commands again and again to respect our parents, even if they are in the wrong. There must be a reason for it and we young people need to trust that!!!

Rather than judging on how our parents/older generation should behave, we (young people) should SET AN EXAMPLE WHILE GIVING THEM RESPECT THAT THEY DESERVE. Easy? not really ... My human inclination is always to judge, fight back when I see something wrong ... Once or twice I can still accept it, but if I 'judge' that he/she doesn't repent from it and his/her heart is not aware that (s)he is wrong, I'll start thinking how and what to say if that person is doing it again (especially if (s)he is doing it to me). I am thinking to even use the Word of God to counter him/her if (s)he is a christian.... very ashamed of myself.

Here are some practical advise if such situation arise:
1. Pray to God and ask him for patience ... *Looking at Jesus usually helps*
2. NEVER talk back impolitely or losing yourself in front of them. *Shut our mouth (even though it hurts a lot) usually helps*
3. SET our hearts to be committed to be more godly and set good examples to them.
4. Talk to them at the later times about our feelings. *This is very important as I find it very useful to do this with my parents lately. It feels good when they finally understand how you feel. I find it useful for them to know my heart as a Christian, what my priorities are, how I treat God, how I treat them, my difficulties in communicating with my parents, my hope for our family, my prayer for them, etc. Sharing my feelings with parents (even though just for a few hours) has much much much larger impact rather than spending time with them without this quality time and sometimes this is not easy for guys*

I hope this entry can be a blessing to us all ... Until then!!

Pohon Jati Diri

Pohon Jati di tengah taman bebungaan
Berdiri tegap kebingungan
Dimanakah buah diri-diri gerangan
Tidak ditemukan di pekarangan

Dimanakah jati sejati
Sudah bertahunan diri rekat berjati
Rekat dekat menyentuh daging
Dipelihara bagai buah kirmizi

Pohon jati kembali mencari diri-diri
Daunnya merambah rambah kanan kiri
Akar merasuk menembus tanah alami
Serat kayu melandau landau seakan tak pernah berhenti
Terus dan terus mencari

Diri pun sadar dan menangis
Tanpa Jati diri tak dapat berdiri
Oh Indahnya dunia taman bebungaan asri
Disaat pertemuan jati diri

2 things to do

1. To be more patient and humble ... especially when I feel threatened by something or someone
2. To be more pro-active in gospel sharing to my family and friends

Relationship stuffs

This is just a quick entry ...

In a relationship, how can we know if our bf/gf is the one from God for us to marry? It's a hard thing to answer, because I can never give an answer that is definite she is the one 100% ... After all, who can fathom the mind of God?

What I learned this past couple of days/weeks/months/years is that God has a plan for each of His children ... And His plan is always a plan to prosper (spiritual prosperity) and not to harm ... Whatever challenges ahead of us, they are there because God allows them to be there ....

What we should do in a relationship when this question arises are

1. To surrender our life (relationship, plans) to God daily ... Asking for His will be done and to block the way if it's not His will ...
2. Keep working hard in the relationship itself and not slacking off ...

Back to the topic, my experience with my past is the same. Like any other normal guy, I had crushes on (Christian) girls. There are 3 cases in my observation:

Case 1:
The girl is not interested ... ^_^

Case 2:
In some cases, I changed my mind about the girl because I saw some characters/incompatibility that I can't bear if she would become my wife... This, I consider as God working in my life and an indication that I shouldn't go into a deeper relationship with that person no matter how much I like that person (after all there are no coincidences in His children's life)

Case 3:
But in some other cases, I didn't see anything that would cause me not continue pursuing the girl (she is in a ministry, not lazy, love God, good communication, bla bla bla) ... Of course she has bad characters as well, but those are not the show-stoppers ... Still God blocked my way somehow (time, activities, future plans, other guy, etc) ... I guess this is also God working in my life, guiding me not to go into a deeper relationship with that person ....

In the three cases above, I was serious in looking for potential gf .. but God somehow blocked my way ... It is no different when I am in a relationship ... God can open the door or close it ...

Many people especially in Chinese new year wants to know his/her luck in the new year. As a Christian, we are lucky to have a God that guides our walk daily.

YES, it is important to know God's will ...
God's plan will be revealed to us at the right time ....
BUT all the more important is whether we accept God's plan/will when it comes and say Your will be done!

Learning to put God first

Matthew 6:20-34

20But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

22"The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are good, your whole body will be full of light. 23But if your eyes are bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!

24"No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money.

Do Not Worry

25"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? 26Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life^[a]?

28"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' 32For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

It is hard to put all things that happen to life in the perspective of God's kingdom ... At least for me, it is difficult ... why? Because I keep forgetting God in all other things that is happening in my life. As hard as I try to remember God, I failed ....

- If I work, I should think of focusing on how the gospel and Jesus can be glorified to my work instead of focusing on enhancing my career or other little things at work

- If I am in a relationship, I should focus more on how to honor God through this relationship by honoring and loving my girlfriend

- If I invest, I should do it in a light of providing for myself, my future family, and the work of the gospel in the place where God wants me to be

- If I invest in property, I should do it in a light of providing the shelter and security for my future family so they too can bring glory to God in the end

- If I engage my work friends or friends in general, I should be focusing more on how to bring them to know Jesus and the gospel lovingly and respectfully, rather than focusing solely on having fun with them and chat about general life conditions

- If I am doing ministry at church, I should focus more on serving others and God, not my own pride

Well, it is hard for me!! But will try to always remind myself in the process of this life!!

ENGAGE - conference

Just wanna share a bit about ENGAGE conference that I attended lately ... I guess I am not gonna share the summary of the kotbah, but I will try to share the Word of God that struck me during the conference ...

OK, a little background about ENGAGE ... ENGAGE is one of the conference ran by Katoomba Christian Center by evangelical churches which is intended for young professional ... I went there last week and there were about 1000+ people gathered in mount Katoomba, Sydney ... It's always amazing to see God's people gathering together to hear God's Word and sing praises to His name !!! Always Good!!

Well, let me share what struck me there ... I guess I will remember ENGAGE as a reminder to self about my love for my Lord Jesus ... A reminder to love Him like when I first became a Christian ... I can't say that I forgot to pray or have a quiet time everyday, but my passion for God has become eroded by all the other things in life, like work, church activities, social activities, relationship, investment, etc ... One example would be, I forgot to spend enough time in my prayer to adore God and say that I LOVE GOD in my prayer .... or another example would be during praise and worship at church ... Kalo dulu I can be very easily moved by church songs yang mengena to my situation, but now kayaknya jarang juga due to always busy playing music, etc ....

I guess it is a reminder that God's command is to LOVE God with all my heart, mind and soul and to love others like myself ... I cried to God during the conference and prayed that God kept guarding my heart to keep loving Him and others ... and not to lose focus on that ...

One of the speaker said something like: "If after this conference, your love for God has grown and grown and grown, than I would consider this conference to be a successful one" ... I guess it's true that our knowledge of the Word of God will only become knowledge when we don't love God and adore Him in all our ways ... We need to love God first and I believe the Holy Spirit will teach us about the scripture in His own unique way ... But loving God must be a priority ...

So friends, hope this can be a good reminder for us too ...!!

Random thought!

This is just a random thought OK ...

I was just thinking the other day:

Why is it that a church, that is supposed to be a place where sinful people who have been saved by God - encourage each other, forgive each other turn out to be a place where people is expected to be so holy and never make any mistake? Plus if we hear someone at church has fallen into sin (say sexual sin, and it was purely accidental and not intentional), we tend to judge him/her and talk behind his/her back, menjauh dari dia, etc?

This is just one of the irony that came up to my attention about the church! Aren't we (including myself) becoming more like a pharisee if we do that?

UpDATe - work

It's been a long time since my last update ...

Well, let me share about my work and what I do lately ... This sharing is in no way intended to boast about myself, but it's just purely a sharing and thanking God for His provision in my life ...

Work has been good ... thank God ... I have moved from ELAW (the only workplace in my entire working life that I didn't like very much) to CISCO ... Yayyy!!! I had to admit, it was very risky to move out of COIN software to ELAW in the first place ... I was considering to move purely due to the consideration of myself being "underpaid" ... I had to admit that ... and since the job market was very very very very good as well, I thought why not try to look around ... After all, given that in Australia people is entitled to be paid according to their skills, I saw nothing wrong in looking for a job just to get a pay that is close to what market is offering at the time!

It didn't turn out well at ELAW and I wanted to get out of there starting from the first week ... *so ashamed of myself* ... And then I looked for a job again ... Thank God that I got this job at Cisco ... I wasn't looking for an analyst/project coordinator role, but somehow God gave it to me *all things come from God* ... It was very much a surprise that I was offered this position even though 95% of the application that I sent was for .NET programmer role ... I was starting a bit desperate and really look up to God to give me a job ... I thought, it should be easy for me to move out of ELAW (due to my arrogance), but God somehow allow a lot of rejections happened to my job interviews ... I was starting to feel a bit hopeless after a few months at ELAW and all the frustration in the job that I did there ....

But thank Goddddd banget! .. I got a job at Cisco ... It's like a gift dari langit ... Better still, this job requires ZERO coding, which I really like ... So far so good at Cisco and praying that it will continue this way!

Good lessons learned ...
1. Always depend on God for everything ....
2. Acknowledge Him in all my decision making ....
3. Focus on His kingdom and righteousness rather than unimportant stuffs in this world ...

Question??? :)

What is the ideal number for a guy and a girl in a relationship say "I love u" in a day, a week, a month?
- Once a day?
- Once a week?
- Once a month?
- More?
- Less?

This question assume that the guy/girl really mean what they say ... *ga gombal*

Encouragement

I was encouraged by one thing that I saw at church ... I saw one of pension elder who went to church last Sunday where he had to use a tool to support his movement, but still faithfully come to Sunday morning service to worship God ....

I saw that every week, but it only strike me last week that that elder has been faithful for so many years and he is still going strong .... It reminds me how important it is to love God with all my heart until I am old, until death ....

"It's always good to start strong, but more importantly to finish as strong as we can be"

Death and suffering (in theory and practice)

Lately, I feel death and suffering are close to the people and friends around me ... Late last week, a friend of mine said that her grandma has passed away ... Just a few days ago, a good friend of mine had an accident ... quite severe one ...

It made me ponder on the question of death and suffering ...

• Well, in theory I know that God can not be blamed for the suffering that happens in this world .... Who are we to say to God the creator of heaven and earth that He doesn't know what He is doing in this world? God is God and He can do whatever He pleases according to His perfect and good will .... It is probably no coincidence that I have just finished the book of Job where suffering is so imminent in Job's life ... and the book talks about Job's suffering from God's perspective, Job's perspective and his friends' perspective ... How Job question God and how God answer him in the end ...
• In theory, I know that God's ultimate plan is for people to be saved ... it is a good and perfect plan ...
• In theory, I know that God will one day remove all the sufferings in this world
• In theory, I know that suffering happen to both Christians and non-Christians in this fallen world ... What differentiate Christian from non-Christian is Christians trust that God knows what He is doing and Christians also hope of eternal life where God will remove all suffering
• In theory, I know that God understand our pain and suffering because Jesus himself suffered on the cross ... and God does not just understand, but He helps us in our suffering and strengthen our faith in Him as well ...
  
• In theory, I also know that God can use suffering and pain to make us more like Jesus ...

Those things above are all theoretical knowledge until you really experience the PAIN .... You can talk all you want about theological answer, but unless you experience the pain like Jesus did, you can't fully understand about the topic ... I do not deny that knowledge is important regardless of whether you are facing difficulties or not, but that will become REAL when painful thing and life difficulties start to HIT us right on our face ....

With regards to what happen to my friends, I don't know the answer to all their life's problem ... Only God does .... What I know is God demands total surrender and reliance on His promises that one day He will remove all sufferings in this world ....

My prayer is that my friend (and myself) can stay faithful until the end and through everything that is happening now and God's plan is revealed fully in our lives ...

Dukaku, tempat kudusMu

Lagi baca buku with judul like the title diatas ... Baru seperempat sih, tapi menarik juga ... It says that waktu kita berduka, kita bisa bertemu Tuhan disana and can learn to re-dedicate our life to Him ... Waktu ancaman bertubi2 datang, kesukaran, kesulitan kita tau bahwa Allah hadir and mengerti ... ga cuman mengerti tapi menolong dan melepaskan kita ... eventually God will remove all kesusahan di dunia ini when Jesus came back again to those who love God ....

John 16:33

33"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."

Rumah baru!! and lama ...

It's still pretty much a mess ... I am trying to beres2 and hopefully bakalan beres sometime this week ... The worry now is ada banyak maling di Kingsford .... Anak2 North Sydney cerita about maling2 yg masuk ke rumah temen2 kita di waktu2 dulu ... It scared me a bit, especially our unit is just on level 1 ... It won't be too hard for a person to jump into the balcony and steal something ... We decided to get a new key in order to make the house more secure ... Hopefully ga ada maling masuk .. It's a bit scary now that I think about it ....

About rumah lama, today was the inspection day from the owner and the agent ... One problem: karpet di deket jendela rusak karena kebocoran air ... Kita sudah lapor awal2 twice or three times tapi agentnya ga respond ... In the end sekarang karpetnya rusak dan ga bisa dipake lagi and harus diganti ... I can understand that the owner is upset and minta diganti, but I explained the situation and in the end they took $250 from our bond money for cleaning purpose only ... I think that is fair given that we lacked in cleaning the house ... Ya sekarang udah lega lah ..

All in all, God's providence is very real in my life ... Just have to keep persevering and menguatkan kepercayaan to my God ...

Not good enough!

Susah banget rasanya untuk ga bikin salah .... The more I talk, the more I make mistakes ...

Psalm 141:3
Set a guard over my mouth, O LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips.

Thank the Lord!

Fiuhhhh ... Legaaaaaaaaaa .... setelah berminggu2 worried karena ga dapet2 rumah akhirnya we can move into the new place this weekend ...

The problem went into the surface when 3 weeks ago the property agent told me that the owner of my current place wanted to use the property and I have to move out as soon as possible ... I was told by a friend that I can have 2 months by law ... Being the confident me, I proposed to move out in 5 weeks ... I thought 5 weeks should be plenty of time to find a house ... After all, I found a place in 2 days before ....

It turned out that it is not so easy to find a property owner that wants to accept 4 guys in 2 bedroom apartment/townhouse ... Our applications got rejected and sometimes due to our busy schedules we missed the deadlines of submitting the applications ... Moreover, I miscalculated the fact that I need to have at least a buffer of 1 week of signing the contract and arranging the move itself and since finding the rent is so hard these days in sydney, it was so so so so tough !!! We also had lots of requirements, such as we wanted to pay around $350 pw and it must be in either Kingsford (1st priority), Maroubra, or Randwick ... If the property is a bit far from the main junction, we did not consider it straight away ...

It was so frustrating that some friends at church were afraid to see my tensed face .... I could not hide the fact that I am thinking about where I am going to live in the next 2 weeks ...

I cried out to God ... God please help!! Maybe I was too proud, saying that I could find the property without Him ... But only during the times when I had no choice but surrendering to Him, I learnt what it meant to trust Him fully .... I mean fully!! That does not mean that I didn't do anything ... I did my research every night, and called the agents during the day arranging for inspections ... I ran around here and there to inspect the property and filled in a tedious application forms ... It was so much trouble ... But I did surrender to my God at the same time .... because I know it is pretty hard to find a property that we want ....

During these times, I felt so blessed to have a family in Christ and many good friends ... I asked almost all of my friends for help!! and so many of my them offered me help .... Ada yg mau pinjemin garage nya, many sent emails to friends regarding my situation and asking if there is anyone interested in a room around eastern suburb area ... Ada yg just bantuin inspect the house because I could not make it for I had pelayanan on that hour ... My flatmates and my bro banyak bantuin juga, even though mrk pada sibuk assignment and exam ... Terharu sih !! Thank u friends!! I am grateful banget nget nget ....

Yesterday, the four of us at home prayed asking God for guidance ... Initially, we decided to take the house nearby, but we need one more person to fill in one of the room ... We made that decision because we thought we need to secure the place first and felt that finding the person to fill in the room should be easier than finding a place to rent ... But suddenly, this morning I got a phone call from one of the agent that I should send a deposit and sign the contract tomorrow morning ... It was a big big relief ... I thanked God straight away for His providence ....

Lastly, I just wanna say that my God is Jehovah Jireh, He provides the need of His children according to His riches and glory, especially spiritual needs .... !

Cari rumah susah banget

A bit frustrated nih cari2 rumah ... Udah mepet banget and we don't even have one accepted application ... The ones yg available is either too expensive atau 3 bedrooms (we only want two bedrooms) ...

So at the moment I am a bit worried, tapi not too worry juga ... Setelah dipikir2 ga ada gunanya worry juga .. Yg penting do our best and trust in God la ... Malah kalo kepepet gini, I learn to rely on God and realize my own limitation ... I also learn to trust others and be patient with them (my flatmates) because kadang mrk not doing according to my expectation (apply rumah telat sehari and keduluan orang, etc) ... I also learn to battle my pride of asking my friends for help ... I am the kind of person yg rada independent and it's very hard for me especially kalo ga deket banget minta tolong ke temen buat hal2 ginian ... gengsi kali yah ... but during these times I learnt to rely on my brother and sister in Christ as well ...

Oh well, two weeks to go ... kalo ga dapet homeless deh *huhuhu* ...